Charlie: "I'll totally pull a Good Will Hunting on those kids and that'll put them in their place."
Mac: "How you gonna do that?"
Charlie: "Well, you've seen the movie right?"
Mac: "Yeah."
Charlie: "So all I gotta do is, I'll ask them some big shot, like math or science, history-type college question aand that will totally stump them by knowing a lot more about the answer than they do."
Mac:"In that movie, Matt Damon played a genius janitor, you're just a janitor."
Charlie: "Right, you stumped me with that one."

Mac : "Everybody relax. He's lying. He doesn't have any poison."
Charlie Kelly : "No, I don't have any on me. But, I do keep some in my fridge at home in the relish jar."
Frank Reynolds :" There's poison in that jar? I thought I was allergic to pickles."
[pause]
Frank Reynolds : " What's in the jar with the skull and crossbones?"
Charlie Kelly : "Well, that's mayonnaise. That's a decoy."
Frank Reynolds : " And the mayo?"
Charlie Kelly : "That's shampoo."
Frank Reynolds : "You're telling me I've been putting shampoo on my sandwiches?"
Charlie Kelly : "If you're using the mayonnaise, yeah... probably."

Mac : "Everybody relax. He's lying. He doesn't have any poison."
Charlie Kelly : "No, I don't have any on me. But, I do keep some in my fridge at home in the relish jar."
Frank Reynolds :" There's poison in that jar? I thought I was allergic to pickles."
[pause]
Frank Reynolds : " What's in the jar with the skull and crossbones?"
Charlie Kelly : "Well, that's mayonnaise. That's a decoy."
Frank Reynolds : " And the mayo?"
Charlie Kelly : "That's shampoo."
Frank Reynolds : "You're telling me I've been putting shampoo on my sandwiches?"
Charlie Kelly : "If you're using the mayonnaise, yeah... probably."